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Когда вы хотите, чтобы священнослужитель завопил, ударьте его по карману — это место у него самое чувствительное.
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Щедрость пап и королей имеет ту особенность, что она им лично ничего не стоит.
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В больших дозах мистицизм приводит к безумию, в малых — к одичанию.
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Человеческая глупость столь же неисповедима, как и пути Господни.
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Обсуждались важные вопросы, главным образом касающиеся их подданных; последним, разумеется, полагалось оставаться в неведении: повара не спрашивают птицу, под каким соусом ее вкуснее зажарить и подать к столу.
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Как ещё можно доказать превосходство одной религии над другой? Очевидно, лучшим богом является тот, во имя которого проливается больше крови. Что ж, по количеству пролитой крови наше триединое божество занимает первое место в мировом пантеоне.
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